Paris has turned us all into sluts, y'all!

San Francisco, CA (PRWEB) February 27, 2009 -- A 2009 study conducted by the online dating site AdultsOnlyList.com reveals that women are more likely to have an intimate encounter with men whom they have known for less than 6 hours. The poll of 20,000 women daters aged 18 - 35 asked of them to define exactly how long they would wait to engage in any type of intimate encounter after meeting a man for the first time. A staggering 34% revealed that they would wait less than 1 date (or approximately 6 hours) with a man before engaging in intimate behaviors.

Website owner Dan Levy proposes that "Women are immersed with the idea, from every media outlet in the country, that having sex on the first date is the norm." He even coined the behavior as "The Paris Hilton Effect." Mr. Levy further explains that "Hollywood and the media have really set the stage for this to be a reality. Every other image the average woman sees is of a major celebrity flashing their underwear or hanging on the arm of a different man every night. That being said, the results aren't very shocking to me."

The women who participated in the poll resided in major cities around the country. The cities included in the poll were San Francisco, New York and Los Angeles. Of the 20,000 women who took part in the study, 24% stated they would wait until the second date, while 42% said at least three or more dates were necessary.

Quiero tu plata, senor! tus perros son HORRIBLES!

NYP= An Upper West Side woman has filed a $500,000 lawsuit charging that her downstair's yappy little dogs are driving her nuts.

Theodore Henderson's two Chihuahuas "bark in a manner that is offensive, constant, continuous and incessant."

Paulette Taylor, 62, says in the suit that the dogs have her so stressed that she can't sleep. The suit adds that Henderson "may even be guilty of inciting his Chihuahuas to bark."

Taylor has complained to Henderson and to the management of their building at 382 Central Park West for well over a year, but they've done nothing, said her lawyer, Jacqueline Bukowski.

"We're asking for a restraining order against the dogs," Bukowski said, or "some sort of soundproofing" to block the barking from coming into Taylor's apartment, which is directly above Henderson's.

AIDS Obama!

A Chicago man has been arrested for allegedly sending Obama and his staff envelopes containing HIV-infected blood, in the hopes of killing or harming them.

It's only the second time ever that HIV-infected blood has been sent with malicious intent through the U.S. mail system, a spokesman for the U.S. Postal Inspection Service said.

In the weeks leading up to Obama's inauguration, Saad Hussein, an Ethiopian refugee in his late 20's, sent an envelope addressed to "Barack Obama" to offices of the Illinois government in Springfield, Ill., according to court documents. The envelope contained a series of unusual items, including a letter with reddish stains and an admission ticket for Obama's election-night celebration in Chicago's Grant Park. Court documents said Hussein, who takes drugs to treat a mental illness, later told FBI agents he is "very sick with HIV" and cut his fingers with a razor so he could bleed on the letter.

Days after sending the letter to Obama, Hussein allegedly placed two more letters in the mail, one addressed to "Emanuel," an apparent reference to Obama's current chief of staff, Rahm Emanuel. The two letters contained what appeared to be dried blood, the court documents said.

Now that's a hot dead body.

Over 16 years, Kenneth Douglas had drug and alcohol infused parties at his workplace. He even participated in coitus with many women.
The problem?

At least three of those women were dead, Hamilton County Prosecutor Joe Deters said Thursday.

But if Douglas is to be believed, he could have had sex with as many as "over a hundred" bodies in the 16 years he worked as night attendant at the Hamilton County morgue.

"This guy's just a pig. I can't explain why someone would do something like this. ... This is off-the-charts weird."

Douglas, 55, of Westwood, already is serving a prison sentence after he pleaded guilty last year to abuse of a corpse. He admitted he had sex with the nearly beheaded body of 19-year-old murder victim Karen Range in 1982.

Thursday, Douglas was indicted on two more counts of abuse of a corpse after DNA evidence, Deters said, showed Douglas' semen was in the bodies of two women who were killed in 1991 and stored at the morgue awaiting autopsies. One of the women was nearly beheaded and 6 months pregnant.

"We'll never know" how many victims there are, Deters said, "because (Douglas) doesn't know. We probably won't (ever) know the scope of his abuse."

Dobson resigns fro Focus on the Family

DENVER (AP) - Conservative evangelical leader James Dobson has resigned as chairman of Focus on the Family but will continue to play a prominent role at the organization he founded more than three decades ago, The Associated Press has learned.

Dobson notified the board of his decision Wednesday, and the 950 employees of the Colorado Springs, Colo.-based ministry were informed Friday morning at a monthly worship service, said Jim Daly, the group's president and chief executive officer.

Dobson, 72, will continue to host Focus on the Family's flagship radio program, write a monthly newsletter and speak out on moral issues, Daly said.

"One of the common errors of founder-presidents is to hold to the reins of leadership too long, thereby preventing the next generation from being prepared for executive authority," Dobson said in a statement. "... Though letting go is difficult after three decades of intensive labor, it is the wise thing to do."

"I don't see any dramatic departure from what Focus stands for," Caruana said of Dobson's leaving the board. "There are obviously younger people the ministry would like to reach, and we're on track to do that."

you are the cause of global warming. sheryl crow wins.

Was gonna re-write, but its too perfect.[from the Guardian]
The tenderness of the delicate American buttock is causing more environmental devastation than the country's love of gas-guzzling cars, fast food or McMansions, according to green campaigners. At fault, they say, is the US public's insistence on extra-soft, quilted and multi-ply products when they use the bathroom.

"This is a product that we use for less than three seconds and the ecological consequences of manufacturing it from trees is enormous," said Allen Hershkowitz, a senior scientist at the Natural Resources Defence Council.

"Future generations are going to look at the way we make toilet paper as one of the greatest excesses of our age. Making toilet paper from virgin wood is a lot worse than driving Hummers in terms of global warming pollution." Making toilet paper has a significant impact because of chemicals used in pulp manufacture and cutting down forests.

Paper manufacturers such as Kimberly-Clark have identified luxury brands such as three-ply tissues or tissues infused with hand lotion as the fastest-growing market share in a highly competitive industry. The New York Times reported a 40% rise in sales of luxury brands of toilet paper in 2008.

racist fired for black jokes.

LOS ALAMITOS, Calif. (AP) — The mayor of Orange County city Los Alamitos says he will resign after sendingan off-color email to a "small group for friends."

The email was a picture depicting the White House lawn planted with watermelons under the title "No Easter egg hunt this year."

Mayor Dean Grose issued a statement Thursday saying he is sorry and will step down as mayor at Monday's City Council meeting. He admits that the e-mail was in poor taste and claims he was unaware of the racial stereotype linking black people with eating watermelons.

tuppence the pot. Ryanair charges forin-flight potty use.

Low-cost airline Ryanair is looking at the possibility of installing a coin slot on lavatory doors.

Ironically, in a light-hearted survey conducted by Telegraph Travel last November, we asked readers which service they thought no-frills airlines might start charging for in the future.

56 per cent of readers said that a charge for "using the loo" would be the most likely, while 31 per cent chose "reclining seats" and 11 per cent opted for "sick bags".

One Ryanair spokesman, Michael O’Leary, said that Ryanair was determined to make air travel easier and more affordable.
“I don’t think there’s anybody in history gone on board a Ryanair flight with less than a pound,” he added.

Later, Ryanair spokesman Stephen McNamara said: "Michael makes a lot of this stuff up as he goes along and, while this has been discussed internally, there are no immediate plans to introduce it.

"However, this highlights Ryanair's continuing obsession with lowering costs and passing these savings on in the form of lower fares.

The Dublin-based airline has gained a reputation for its high booking fees and ancillary charges.

The carrier charges £30 to check in a bag, £10 to pay for flights with a debit or credit card (excluding Visa Electron), £60 to check in sports or music equipment, £15 for each kilo of excess baggage, £50 to change a flight and £100 to change the name on a ticket.

wipe your ass on this one.

“Natural living” advocates unveil their latest planet-saving invention - the reusable toilet wipe.
[Family Wipes: $11 per dozen basic, $20 per dozen premium, hemp, or sherpa]
buy your friendly poo wipes here

NBC orders Jerry Seinfeld reality series

Jerry Seinfeld: reality genius.
Look for "The Marriage Ref" on NBC quite soon [tentatively, this fall].
It features celebrities, comedians and athletes who will judge couples in the midst of marital disputes while recommending various strategies to resolve their problems.

Always using his own personal miseries to inspire shows...lets see if being boring, old, and married can match up to single and ridiculous.

Police subdue naked man after baby-choking

FITCHBURG — After a violent police struggle, a man who allegedly choked a 9-month-old baby has been arrested.

Dean J. Jones, 40, joined a female acquaintance and her young son for a birthday party. It was not long before Mr. Jones grabbed her son and ran to her waiting minivan. A friend of the woman’s got into the car with Mr. Jones and asked him to give her the baby.

“This is when Dean began to act crazy again saying that she and (the mother) was the devil and that they were going to die,” the witness told police.

The boy’s mother told Mr. Jones to give her the child, whereupon, she said, the man said her son was the devil, put his hands around the child’s neck and squeezed. She tried to grab her son but Mr. Jones punched her in the head, according to police reports.

Police were called, and they found signs of struggle at the scene, though Jones was gone. Minutes later, however, police received a call about a naked man walking a few blocks over.

Officer Steven Hachey was the first on the scene and approached the naked pedestrian, later identified as Mr. Jones. He opened the passenger side window of his cruiser to speak with Mr. Jones, who allegedly grabbed the glass and shattered it before trying to enter the vehicle.

Officer Hachey backed up his cruiser and was chased by Mr. Jones, who pounded on the vehicle’s hood, Capt. Kearns said.

The officer eventually got out of his cruiser and Mr. Jones climbed in, but was unable to move it because Officer Hachey had removed the keys, Capt. Kearns said.

Police fired several pepper balls at Mr. Jones, striking him in the chest. The impact had no effect on him, police said. Mr. Jones was subdued by baton strikes and his legs were taped to contain his flailing limbs, according to police reports.

Mr. Jones referred to himself as Jesus Christ during the confrontation, police reports indicate.

Capt. Kearns said the child did not appear to have suffered any serious injuries.

He commended the work of the officers who responded to the incident.

“This guy was clearly out of control,” he said. “A lot of things could have gone wrong with that. Instead, he was taken into custody without a lot of associated injuries.”

Mr. Jones was arraigned on charges of assault and battery on a child causing injury, disorderly conduct, malicious destruction of property over $250, resisting arrest and assault and battery.

He was ordered to return to court March 12 for a pretrial hearing.

hheeeyyyy....chhhaaarrrrrlllliiieee...

Cave Man Faces Foreclosure

Curt Sleeper and his family sold their home and moved into a cave to save some dough. Unfortunately, they had a mortgage on their just-out-of-St. Louis cave.
Now, because he is unable to re-finance, Sleeper will be putting his 17,000 square foot cave up for sale on Ebay.
They purchasesd the cave from its owner in 2004 for $170,000.

Man stabs son in left buttock after he refused to take off his hat in church

BALTIMORE (AP) — Police said a 58-year-old man stabbed his teenage son after he refused to take off his hat at church earlier in the day. The father and his 19-year-old son got into an argument on Sunday afternoon. That's when police said the father went to a car, got a knife and stabbed his son in the left buttock and fled.

The son was taken to University of Maryland Medical Center for treatment. The father's name was withheld pending his arrest.

glorious statistic

A recent survey of 10,000 English men revealed that 48 percent actually fall asleep during sex.

Headline of hte day

Teenagers 'spend an average of 31 hours online'
Teenagers spend an average of 31 hours a week online and nearly two hours a week looking at pornography, according to a study.

Ruining my plans for stealth travel: the Cuba Bill

By Alexia Campbell | South Florida Sun Sentinel
While most of the nation focused on the stimulus bill winding through Congress, nine representatives introduced a bill calling for an end to the 46-year-old ban on travel to Cuba.

The Freedom to Travel to Cuba Act introduced in the U.S. House of Representatives on Feb. 4 would allow American citizens unrestricted travel to Cuba for the first time since 1963. The bill by Rep. William Delahunt, D-Mass., and eight co-sponsors would also lift limits on travel by Cuban exiles living in the United States. The president would not be able to regulate travel to the island unless an armed conflict or armed danger arises.

[Many argue that such a bill will pour more money into the wrong hands, as US tourists will stay in the hotels and resorts that Cubans are banned from.]

Many expect President Barack Obama to back a change in the policy. As a candidate for the presidency, Obama spoke in favor of reducing restrictions on remittances and travel to the island.

TV in your Contacts! Soon!

Telegraph- Futurologist Ian Pearson speaks out on the new tv-in-your-eyes contact lenses, projected to come out in as soon as 10 years time. Pearson told the Daily mail that sets would be powered by the viewers body heat, and that the channel could be changed by voice command or with a wave of the hand.

"Emotional viewing" could be another development in television technology, according to a report commissioned by the technology retailer Comet.
A "digital tattoo" fitted to the viewer would pick up on the feelings of characters on screen and create impulses causing them to feel the same way.

"We could even get to the point where we'll be able to immerse ourselves in a football game, making it feel like you're running alongside your favourite player or berating the ref," the report added.

Miriam Rayman, of the Future Laboratory consultancy, which compiled the report, said the basic technology needed for the developments already existed.
She said: "The technology is getting smaller and smaller and people are trying to work out how to make it more immersible. They are trying to bring it closer and closer to the eye."

TONS of pot found in school bus

LAredo, TX(AP) - whats better than a ton of pot in a bus? 4 1/2 tons, which is what was found in an abandoned school bus near the US-Mexico border.
The Texas Department of Public Safety is reporting htat a state trooper found the drugs over the weekend.
Separated into 560 bundles, weighing more than 9,200 lbs. the pot was hidden under a false floor and in secret ceiling compartments.
This is the second largest Texan seizure since 1997.

Quote of the Day: Netanyahu

On Netanyahu, probable winner of tomorrow's Israeli elections:

“He’s extremely effective politically, unbelievably smart and relentlessly suspicious when it comes to the Arabs and the Americans,” says former U.S. negotiator Aaron David Miller, author of “The Much Too Promised Land: America’s Elusive Search for Arab-Israeli Peace.”

Gel Provides AIDS protection.

WASHINGTON (Reuters) – An Indevus Pharmaceuticals gel formulated to protect women from the virus that causes AIDS appeared to protect about a third of them from infection -- the first time a so-called microbicide has been shown to work, researchers led by Dr. Salim Abdool Karim of the Center for the AIDS Program of Research in South Africatold a conference in Montreal.
The trial was performed on 3,000 women, of whom 30% were protected.

Fucked up story of the YEAR

Fla. doctor loses license after botched abortion
[buffalo news] The Board of Medicine has revoked the license of a Florida doctor accused of medical malpractice in a botched abortion case in which a live baby was delivered, but ended up dead in a cardboard box.

The Department of Health said Dr. Pierre Jean-Jacque Renelique was scheduled to perform an abortion on a teenager who was 23 weeks pregnant in 2006. Sycloria Williams had been given drugs in advance to dilate her cervix.

According to the complaint, she gave birth at a Hialeah clinic after waiting hours for Renelique to arrive. The complaint said one of the clinic owners put the baby in a bag that was thrown away.

Things that Are OBVIOUSLY making fun of Asians.

But no, Ms. Cyrus claims that it has been taken out of context:
'I've been told there are some people upset about some pictures taken of me with friends making goofy faces!
'Well, I'm sorry if those people looked at those pics and took them wrong and out of context. I'm no way was I making fun of any ethnicity.'
[subtext: I'm not racist, look! I have an ASIAN FRIEND....]

best mugshot award

Lil' Wayne, My man, in Playboy.

12. How cautious are you when it comes to having sex?

Lil Wayne: I have to be more cautious now. Let me tell you the trick to that. What you do is stop ramming them hos and make love to that pussy! Make that pussy love you and that rubber ain't going nowhere. That rubber will be right there where you started off with if you make love to that pussy. That's when a nigga fuck up, when you trying to do too much. A nigga like me, I am gonna make the pussy so wet that there's no such thing as popping or slipping off. Only problem I am gonna have is keep slipping it in.

Obama on Daschle

“I'm here on television saying I screwed up. And that's part of the era of responsibility, is not never making mistakes, it's owning up to them and trying to make sure you don’t repeat them and that's what we intend to do,” he told NBC.

On CNN, he went a little further: “Look, ultimately, I campaigned on changing Washington and bottom-up politics. And I don't want to send a message to the American people that there are two sets of standards, one for powerful people, and one for ordinary folks who are working every day and paying their taxes.”

Interview of MY LIFE

1. What's the most memorable sexual experience you've ever had?
Bob Saget: I shouldn't say this in print, but it was years ago with one of the winners of America's Funniest Home Videos. "Jacuzzi Dog."

2. Ever have sex in a public place? Where?
Banks: In the 10 items or less aisle in the 99 Cent Store. I was so excited I'd spent less than $10 for 10 items that I had an orgasm.

3. How old were you when you lost your virginity and what were the circumstances?
Saget: Forty-five. I was alone at a park in Beverly Hills riding a teeter-totter, and I think my hymen snapped.

4. What celebrity would you most like to have sex with?
Saget: The pig who played Babe.

5. What's the most unusual place you've had sex?
Saget: Am I wrong, is it just me, or are these questions a bit personal?

6. What do you consider the funniest sexual act, and why?
Saget: Having sex with a dentist on nitrous oxide.

7. Ever had sex in an airplane?
Saget: Yes. In the cockpit.

8. Ever had sex with a groupie or fan?
Saget: No. But once with a group of fans. I threw myself into the mosh pit and they 12-teamed me. I felt cheaper by the dozen.

9. Do you have any nicknames for your penis?
Saget: Yes. Ten thousand of them. My favorite is George.

12. Are you good in bed?
Saget: At what?

13. What's your favorite sexual act?
Saget: Cirque du Soleil.

16. What's your favorite part of the female anatomy?
Saget: The mind.

20. What's better than sex?
Saget: Diet Peach Snapple.

21. Do you like to talk dirty while making love?
Saget: Yes, but in Aramaic.

22. What's the best time of day or night to have sex?
Saget: 2:30.

23. What music do you like to listen to during sex?
Saget: The background music from 1 vs. 100.

24. Why?
Saget: Because it adds more drama.
[playboy.]

Bad Tripping Babies on YouTube

linkosaurous

amazing BsAs graffiti.

Czech Prez Agrees with Monckton, calls Gore Liar.

Czech President Vaclav Klaus attacked Al Gore and the science of global warming on Saturday in Davos.

"I don't think that there is any global warming," said the 67-year-old liberal, now president of the EU. "I don't see the statistical data for that."
"I'm very sorry that some people like Al Gore are not ready to listen to the competing theories. I do listen to them.

"Environmentalism and the global warming alarmism is challenging our freedom. Al Gore is an important person in this movement."

HOLES in Alaskan Glacier

ANCHORAGE, Alaska (AP) - Geologists monitoring Mount Redoubt for signs of a possible eruption noticed that a hole in the glacier clinging to the north side of the volcano had doubled in size overnight - and now spans the length of two football fields.

"The glacier is sort of falling apart in the upper part," research geologist Kristi Wallace said.

The signs of heat add to concerns that an eruption is near, which could send an ash cloud about 100 miles northeast toward Anchorage, the state's largest city, or onto communities on the Kenai Peninsula, which is even closer to the mountain on the west side of Cook Inlet. It would be the first eruption since 1990.

Quote of the day

Phelps, on taking hetty bong rips:

"I engaged in behavior which was regrettable and demonstrated bad judgment. I'm 23 years old and despite the successes I've had in the pool, I acted in a youthful and inappropriate way, not in a manner people have come to expect from me. For this, I am sorry. I promise my fans and the public it will not happen again."

But the real kicker:
Debbie Phelps, his mother, cried at the news.

"That hurt worse, maybe, than anything," Phelps wrote. "I had never seen my mother that upset."

Russian Children Have Fucked-Up Childhoods.

This is, in fact, a cute story for kids.

Punxsutawney Phil Says....

MORE WINTER!!!!!

My state, the alcoholics.

Union Leader- Apparently unphased by the looming financial crisis, New England Alcoholics are flocking to the Live Free or Die state to buy cheap spirits. Liquor sales in New Hampshire are up -- about 4 percent higher than last year at this time, according to Mark Bodi, chairman of the New Hampshire State Liquor Commission. And profits are up even more, about 8 percent.

Bodi says that's partly due to out-of-state customers -- who represent nearly half of NHSLC annual sales -- taking advantage of the state's value pricing.
"Just as consumers are moving from Macy's to Marshall's and the like, and are seeking more value, so, too, is this out-of-state segment who shops in our stores," Bodi said.

The liquor commission is "aggressively marketing" its products, he went on, "so we can capitalize on this opportunity, and to leverage this unique value position that a down economy presents."
Of course, fine wine sales are down. Beer sales are trending up after being flat for 5 years.

Says Bodi: "Beer is now seeing a slight reversal in that trend, as many consumers kind of come back home to their favorite brew ... because of the price advantage that beer holds over spirits and wine," he said.