Humanoids are stupid. Laugh at them.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

now this is a true tragedy.

Jogger attacked with a Mars bar
JOGGER was injured after being hit by a frozen Mars bar hurled from a passing car.

The man was running along Sunderland Road, South Shields, when the rock-hard chocolate bar was thrown at him.

Police said the car - a black Nissan or Toyota - then turned round, drove back past the shocked man, and its occupants threw another object at him before driving off.

The bizarre incident, which resulted in the man suffering a swollen ankle, happened at about 10.30am yesterday.
Anyone with information is asked to contact police on 08456 043 043.

who would waste a mars bar? I can't believe what JERKS these dudes are. There are starving children in Africa! STARVING!

today is video post day!

Thrillseekers hiJack-son train

THIS is the moment a group of Thrill seekers hiJack-son a London tube train.
Passengers were left open-mouthed when a group of commuters - including a suited man - got up from their seats and performed the dance featured in Michael Jackson's music video for hit Thriller.


The bemused London Underground travellers clapped as the straight-faced group sat down once they had finished.
A Transport for London spokesperson said: "There are clearly occasions, like this, when everyone enjoys being entertained by some talented people.

"There are other occasions where inconsiderate behaviour can spoil a journey for other passengers. Our message is simply that a little consideration to your fellow passengers can make a real difference to everyone."

very surreal...

Vid of the Day.

I WOULD say that this is the cheeseiest movie I've ever seen, but they have the most perfect (and completely unexpected, truly unnecessary) vibraslap.
And therefore, it is almost holy.
enjoy...the beauty of Maggie Gyllenhall.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

watch this amazing video

http://video.nbc5i.com/player/?id=211596

Buenos Aires


I want to live in these houses.
Too bad it's probably the ghetto.
But man are they sweet.

sluts get busted, kicked out of school.

COLUMBIA (AP) -- Two teenagers have been kicked out of school for kissing on a school bus, and now their families are challenging the decision.

Dominique Goyner and his girlfriend were expelled by the Richland County District Two school board in October for the rest of the academic year.

School officials told Jody Free her son was being removed from school for "sexual misconduct."

But Free saw the tape and says it showed the pair kissing for maybe two minutes. Had it been anything different, she said she would have supported the school's decision.

Her son said he knew he was breaking a rule but was shocked by school's response. He says he hopes the expulsion won't stop him from attending a military academy after graduation.

School district spokeswoman Theresa Riley said she couldn't comment but that the district stands by the decision.

Woman Put Grandson In Dog Crate After He Laced Drinks, Police Say

WASHINGTON COUNTY, Pa. -- A Washington County woman is accused of locking her 10-year-old grandson in a feces-filled dog crate for about 90 minutes.

Police said 51-year-old Rhonda Lehman, of Washington, put the boy in the crate Saturday because the boy laced the family's drinks with lamp oil and household cleaner called "Bam."

Lehman has custody of the boy, who told police he did it because "he was angry because he didn't get to go on a trip" last year, said Washington police Officer James Markley. It is possible the boy had been spiking the drinks for a while, authorities said. Family members became sick, but were not hospitalized.

Police said Lehman also told a county agency if someone didn't come for the boy, she would bury him alive in the back yard. Lehman was charged with child endangerment and making terroristic threats.

On Saturday, the boy was put in a 3-foot-by-4-foot plastic dog cage with only a small metal door for him to look out, Markley said.

The boy's 24-year-old brother, Michael McCreery, is charged with punching the youngster.

"When I asked the brother, I said, 'Why would you punch a 10-year-old in the eye?' he said, 'It's better than what I wanted to do to him,"' Markley said.

Markley said the defendants told authorities they don't believe they did anything wrong.
"They were very calm, like this was nothing," Markley said.

thing is: I dont think it was just a threat. I think this psycho would have buried her grandkid alive (that little shit)

Monday, January 28, 2008

If THEY can do it, why can't we?!?!?

Don't stop Brazil Carnival but be careful: Lula
SAO PAULO (Reuters) - As Brazilians get ready for their annual Carnival celebrations, the government is urging them to practice safe sex and avoid drinking too much.
"Everybody has the right to have fun and enjoy themselves but it is important to remember that the next week we have to work and look after our families," President Luiz Inacio Lula da Silva said on Monday.

The government also started handing out millions of free condoms at the weekend as part of its campaign to combat AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases during Carnival.

Latin America's largest country stops work and indulges in a riot of drinking, dancing and parades accompanied by often licentious behavior.
Lula appealed in his weekly radio address for people to be careful during the partying.
"No one needs to drink or do anything more than normal to enjoy themselves," he said.
Lula is known as a gregarious character who himself enjoys a drink. His dour warning appeared to be partly prompted by a rise in deaths and accidents from drunken driving during the Christmas holidays.

The Health Ministry launched its annual safe sex campaign on Sunday under the slogan "Good in bed means wearing a condom."
"We have to let people know the importance of prevention," Health Minister Jose Gomes Temporao said at an event in Rio.

States and municipalities in the world's largest Roman Catholic country will distribute 19.5 million free condoms for Carnival.

An education program will focus on alerting young women to the dangers of unprotected sex and encourage them to demand that their partners wear condoms.

Thousands of bandanas and temporary tattoos with safe sex slogans will also be handed out to revelers in the big cities.
Recife city also plans to distribute morning-after contraceptive pills -- a move that has angered the Roman Catholic Church hierarchy.


And to think: we, as AMERICANS, can't even teach safe sex in schools. It's just WRONG.

From today, feel free to download another 25 million songs - legally

After a decade fighting to stop illegal file-sharing, the music industry will give fans today what they have always wanted: an unlimited supply of free and legal songs.
Qtrax, a digital service announced today, promises a catalogue of more than 25 million songs that users can download to keep, free and with no limit on the number of tracks.

The service has been endorsed by EMI, Universal Music and Warner Music – who have chased file-sharers through the courts in a doomed attempt to prevent piracy. GOOD LUCK, TOOLS.
The gamble is that fans will put up with a limited amount of advertising around the Qtrax website’s jukebox in return for authorised use of almost every song available.

The service will use the “peer-to-peer” network, which contains not just hit songs but rarities and live tracks from the world’s leading artists.

One problem: not iPod compatible.
Why are these industry moguls so stupid? I don't care how much it costs, pay apple whatever they want...it's the only way you'll succeed.

Qtrax, a subsidiary of Brilliant Technologies Corporation, has raised $30 million (£15 million) to set up the service, which is available in the US and Europe from today. Allan Klepfisz, president of Qtrax, said: “Customers now expect music to be free but they do not want to use illegal sites. We believe this . . . has the support of the music industry and allows artists to get paid.”
WRONG. People believe that music should be free, and don't care where they get the tracks becuause of a feeling of entitlement. Stealing music has never felt dirty, because there is no face that you are stealing from except that of the dude who just ran over your puppy in one of his 18 Hummers.

...still, I'm willing to give it a try. :)

Saturday, January 26, 2008

eternal hellfire?

It's possible that I am going to hell. Maybe this does make me a bad person. But something about watching the slow downfall of people is so...erotic. I mean, how could you not adore watching poor Britney crumble?
she went from being so unbelievably, unattainably hot to......multiple personalities. One wears a pink wig and loves Del Taco (who doesn't?) One speaks in the WORST fake Brit accent I've ever heard (and I've heard some pretty bad ones; one in particular: you know who you are) and UK Brit LOVES Starbucks Frappuccinos (once again, who doesn't?)
But now, instead of doing a zillino crunches after, she just smokes cigarettes.
Makes me feel better about myself.
I hate to say it, but I may be unable to quit this paparazzi addiction.....LiLo just looks too good all the time to satiate the desire for hotness any other way.
Though it's been two weeks sans Perez, I am thrilled.
GO RACH!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Ohio Nurse Accused of Raping Elderly

SANDUSKY, Ohio (AP) - A night-shift nurse accused of sexually abusing at least two dozen elderly or disabled patients at a nursing home was in jail Wednesday, authorities said.

Many of the victims at Concord Care and Rehabilitation Center were unable to report the abuse, and some have since died, said Perkins Township Police Chief Tim McClung.

Police said that suspect John Riems, 49, recalled abusing nearly 100 patients during a 20-year career but that he could remember specific information only on 24.

Riems, 49, pleaded not guilty Tuesday in Sandusky Municipal Court to felony charges of rape and gross sexual imposition. The jail didn't have information on an attorney for Riems.
point of contention: how can you have detailed memories of the rapes, yet plead not guilty? ridiculous.

The director of the nursing home said in a statement that Riems had been fired.

"We cannot share any more detail at this time out of respect for the privacy of our residents, and in light of the ongoing police investigation," Jessica Short said in the statement.

Investigators are looking into Riems' past, which includes employment at other facilities. McClung wouldn't identify the other places where he worked.

...almost enough to make me want to bathe daily.
almost.

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Can't we all just hold hands and sing Kumbayah?

Dutch Braced For 'Koran Insult' Backlash
If I insult you, am I responsible for your violence?
It's a question being debated in the Netherlands this week as Dutch embassies around the world beef up their security ahead of the release of a film on the internet which allegedly insults the Koran. It's reported to show the Koran being torn up and otherwise desecrated.

The extreme right wing politician Geert Wilders has made the ten minute film promoting his belief that the Koran inspires people 'to do the worst things'. His views have inspired him to talk about a 'Tsunami of Islamisation' in Europe, for the Koran to be banned, and for Dutch Muslims to either give up their religion or leave the country.

These remarks have gained his party nine seats in the 150 seat parliament and himself a 24 hour police guard.

He needs it. The last Dutchman to make a film which angered some ended up with a knife in his chest attached to a note insulting Jews and Christians. Theo Van Gogh's murderer, an Islamist, also attempted to behead his victim in the street.

The violence of the Danish Cartoon protests of 2005 roared around the world and resulted in dozens of deaths. Now, hearing of the Wilders film, the Iranian Parliament has warned of 'extensive repercussions around the world' if it's shown

Mr Wilders has reacted by announcing he will delay release for two weeks and accepts he may have to leave the country. Dutch Embassies around the world have been put on alert and the Dutch counter terrorist services have held emergency meetings with the Government. Most politicians in the Netherlands believe Mr Wilders is being inflammatory and insulting, but are sticking to the principle of freedom of expression.

It could all come to nothing, but it could get ugly. The Grand Mufti of Syria accuses Mr Wilders of 'inciting wars and bloodshed and he will be responsible'.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Police Chief's Wife Accused of Sex, Drugs With Boys

trashy trashy trashy
isnt this where Eva is from?

NEW CITY, N.Y. — A former prosecutor who is also a police chief's wife has been charged with having sex, smoking marijuana and drinking with teenage boys.

Beth Modica, 44, a former assistant district attorney in Rockland County and Queens, pleaded not guilty Tuesday to counts including statutory rape, sex abuse and endangering children. Bail was set at $75,000.

The 35-count indictment says that, beginning in July, Modica had sex with a 16-year-old, as well as oral sex with that boy and a 15-year-old. The judge issued orders of protection for the boys.

Modica also is accused of drinking with children at her home and smoking marijuana with them in her car.

She would face a prison term of one and one-third to four years if convicted.

Ramapo Police Chief Peter Brower said the investigation began Dec. 31, when his department received a complaint in the mail. He said the students involved go to a high school which is also attended by Modica's 16-year-old son.

...does that make the kid cool or uncool? How do peers view sexual experiences with little Timmy's mom? I wonder...

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enjoy all the freudian slips.







and the best one:

thank you job rineman for making my day better

Dear America: Suck My Left Nut. Love, Pervez

Musharraf: Pakistan Isn't Hunting Usama


PARIS — Pervez Musharraf says he still gets the question a lot: When will Usama bin Laden and his top deputy be caught? The Pakistani president insists it's more important for his 100,000 troops on the Afghan border to root out the Taliban than search for Al Qaeda leaders.

That bin Laden and Ayman al-Zawahiri are still at large "doesn't mean much," the former general said Tuesday on the second day of a swing through Europe. He suggested they are far less a threat to his regime than Taliban-linked militants entrenched in Pakistan's west.

Bin Laden and al-Zawahiri are believed to be hiding somewhere in the lawless tribal areas along Afghanistan's frontier with Pakistan.

"The 100,000 troops that we are using ... are not going around trying to locate Usama bin Laden and Zawahiri, frankly," Musharraf told a conference at the French Institute for International Relations. "They are operating against terrorists, and in the process, if we get them, we will deal with them certainly."

read: Dear Georgie,
You are a fucktard. I tricked you! HA! I win! I killed that bitch you liked and I'm friends with your boy Osama! HAHAHAHAHA me me me me me.
<3
Prez. PM
...Why do we trust terrorist nations? I don't know.

Dear World: I am a cunt. Love, Ringo.

Ringo Starr Walks Off 'Regis and Kelly' Show Over Song Flap

NEW YORK — Ringo Starr is known for being the amiable Beatle, but the rock star showed his tough side Tuesday when he walked off the set of "Live With Regis and Kelly" rather than cut short one of his songs.

When told Tuesday morning that the performance had to be shortened, Freund said Starr tried to cut about a minute of the song's 4 minute, 15 second length, down to 3 minutes and 30 seconds. However, according to Freund, producer Michael Gelman said it had to be less than 3 minutes.

"We offered to cut back our chat time and asked them to fade or go to commercial. They were not willing to do that and Ringo was not willing to cut it further, so without a compromise we were not able to stay," Freund said in a statement to The Associated Press. "Ringo left saying, `God bless and goodbye. We still love Regis."'

A spokeswoman for "Regis and Kelly" disputed some of Freund's contentions. The representative, who declined to be named -- citing show policy -- told the AP the show's producers tried to work with Starr. The spokeswoman also said the time of his song was almost 5 minutes, not 4 minutes and 15 seconds. She also said that his appearance had been booked since November and that Starr's representatives had agreed to the time requirement for the song.

This is absurd. I have no words. Cut your god damned song, you suck anyways. Really, you should be greatful that they want you on the show after 8 decades of garbage...straight outa liverpool.

World's Greatest Dad' Mug Presented as Evidence in Trial of Father Accused of Killing Girl

NEW YORK — Nixzmary Brown may have bought her stepfather, accused of killing the 7-year-old girl, a mug that read "World's Greatest Dad," a defense attorney said.

But a prosecutor said Tuesday that her stepfather was anything but, given the abuse the girl experienced in his care.

A photograph of the mug was introduced as evidence during the defense's cross-examination of a detective on Tuesday in the murder trial of Cesar Rodriguez, who has pleaded not guilty to charges he killed the girl with a blow to the head while punishing her for stealing some yogurt.

Outside the court, defense attorney Jeffrey Schwartz said that he believed Nixzmary bought the mug for her 29-year-old stepfather for Father's Day in 2005.

"Ironically, Nixzmary bought it for him," he said.
The defense has attempted to portray Rodriguez as an overworked, loving family man who harshly disciplined the girl — including binding and beating her — because of her unruly behavior toward her siblings. But the defense says the mother dealt the deathblow.

If convicted, Rodriguez faces 25 years to life in prison. Nixzmary's mother is expected to face a separate murder trial later this year.

so really: no one denies that the dude repeatedly beat the girl...shouldn't he be in jail either way? This shit makes me so angry. how could you possibly look at a little beautiful child with such anger. not to mention the natural guilt of them being so small - you could step on her!
argh

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Iowa Police Officer Stripped of His Duties After Traffic Stop Sex

A Cedar Rapids, Iowa police officer was stripped of his duties after he admitted having consensual sexual relations with a woman following a traffic stop, the Cedar Rapids Gazette reported.

Kevin Sims, 36, was on duty as a police officer when he stopped at a bar to do a bar check, greeting a woman he knew from previous checks, the newspaper reported.

About a half-hour after the check, Sims pulled the woman's car over as she left the bar, according to the report.

She told him she had a suspended license, but instead of taking her information, Sims took her to a park where the woman and Sims had "intimate relations" while Sims was on duty, the Cedar Rapids Gazette reported.

In a plea agreement between Sims and prosecutors, the ex-policeman will never be allowed to be a law enforcement officer anywhere, the newspaper reported.

here's a rundown:

Cop: mam, do you know how fast you were going?
slut: why officer, Im not quite sure? but obviously not fast enough for a man like you.
cop: i saw you leave that bar over yonder. (it was in iowa) have you been drinking?
slut: i only had one......just enough to lower my inhibitions enough to (touching his sticking-out chest hair) warm my senses.
cop: hows about i warm your senses over in those bushes?

[[fucking commences]]
are you kidding me? how does this shit even happen? i've been pulled over more than once, and trust me...we've never spoken long enough to make that happen.

Media Study Claims Bush Administration Lied Hundreds of Times About Iraq

WASHINGTON — A study by two nonprofit journalism organizations found that President Bush and top administration officials issued hundreds of false statements about the national security threat from Iraq in the two years following the 2001 terrorist attacks.

The study concluded that the statements "were part of an orchestrated campaign that effectively galvanized public opinion and, in the process, led the nation to war under decidedly false pretenses."

The study was posted Tuesday on the Web site of the Center for Public Integrity, which worked with the Fund for Independence in Journalism. White House spokesman Scott Stanzel said he could not comment on the study because he had not seen it.

The study counted 935 false statements in the two-year period. It found that in speeches, briefings, interviews and other venues, Bush and administration officials stated unequivocally on at least 532 occasions that Iraq had weapons of mass destruction or was trying to produce or obtain them or had links to Al Qaeda or both.

"It is now beyond dispute that Iraq did not possess any weapons of mass destruction or have meaningful ties to Al Qaeda," according to Charles Lewis and Mark Reading-Smith of the Fund for Independence in Journalism staff members, writing an overview of the study. "In short, the Bush administration led the nation to war on the basis of erroneous information that it methodically propagated and that culminated in military action against Iraq on March 19, 2003."

Named in the study along with Bush were top officials of the administration during the period studied: Vice President Dick Cheney, national security adviser Condoleezza Rice, Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld, Secretary of State Colin Powell, Deputy Defense Secretary Paul Wolfowitz and White House press secretaries Ari Fleischer and Scott McClellan.


Fucked Up.

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Boy, 6, With Rare Allergy Can Eat Only Deer Meat

classy.

NEW HAVEN, Conn. — A 6-year-old Plainville, Conn., boy is suffering from a rare food allergy and deer meat is the only solid protein the boy can stomach, according to his family.

Timmy Armstrong has eosinophilic esophagitis, a condition in which food allergies trigger an intense inflammation of the esophagus, according to a report from WTNH News Channel 8.

In addition to venison, Timmy is able to stomach small amounts of natural oats, salt and sugar, according to his father, Tim Armstrong Sr. Timmy is fed through a tube.

GROSS. This kids life is gonna SUCK, if he makes it to 10.

Witnesses, Officials Say Thousands of Palestinians Flood Into Egypt Through Breached Gaza Wall

GAZA CITY, Gaza Strip — Tens of thousands of Palestinians poured into Egypt from Gaza Wednesday after masked gunmen used land mines to blast down a seven-mile barrier dividing the border town of Rafah.

Men and women walked unhindered or rode in donkey carts over the toppled corrugated metal along sections of the barrier, carrying goats, chickens and crates of Coca-Cola. Some brought back televisions, car tires and cigarettes and one man even bought a motorcycle. Vendors sold soft drinks and baked goods to the crowds.

They were stocking up on goods made scarce by an Israeli blockade of their impoverished territory since last week and within hours, shops on the Egyptian side of the divided border town of Rafah had run out of stock.

the truly tragic part:
Ibrahim Abu Taha, 45, a Palestinian father of seven, was in the Egyptian section of Rafah with his two brothers and $185 in his pocket.

"We want to buy food, we want to buy rice and sugar, milk and wheat and some cheese," Abu Taha said, adding that he would also buy cheap Egyptian cigarettes.

Abu Taha said he could get the basic foods in Gaza, but at three times the cost.

[it's sad that they can't just stop killing everyone. then maybe they'd be allowed their milk.]

Police from the militant Islamic group Hamas, which controls Gaza, directed the traffic. Egyptian border guards took no action.

"Freedom is good. We need no border after today," said unemployed 29-year-old Mohammed Abu Ghazal.
and here comes the spin, thanks to the Egyptian president{Murbarak}:
"But today a great number of them came back because the Palestinians in Gaza are starving due to the Israeli siege," he said.

reality: No starvation has been reported in Gaza. But many of the 1.5 million residents have faced critical shortages of electricity, fuel and other supplies over months because Gaza has been virtually sealed since Hamas seized control of the territory by force in June.

Maid's Boss Is Her Long-Lost Father

Leaving behind an abusive husband and two grown children, a Vietnamese woman left for Taiwan in search of the father she never met. Little did she know he would end up as her employer.

Tran Thi Kham, 40, took a job as a maid caring for 70-year-old Tsai Han-chao's paralyzed wife, the Hong Kong Herald reported.

When she died, Kham left for another job, but left behind a photo of her father and a ring he gave to Kham's mother, the Hong Kong Herald reported.

Han-chao found it and was in shock.

"I checked my wife's cabinet and saw the parcel and opened it to see what was inside," Han-chao told the newspaper. "When I saw my photo and the ring, I nearly fainted."

The two were reunited earlier this month the Hong Kong Herald reported.

[oh, isn't that cute.]

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NASA Photo Shows Humanoid Figure on Mars

Please oh please oh please PLEASE FOX TELL ME you're kidding.
Is it Bigfoot? A Tusken Raider from the first "Star Wars" movie? Or just a rock?



British newspapers went crazy Wednesday morning about an image from Mars that appears to show a humanoid figure descending a shallow hillside.

The "alien" is actually a blurry detail in a huge panoramic photograph snapped on the edge of Mars' Gusev crater by NASA's Spirit rover in early November, and posted on NASA's Web site on Jan. 2.

Naturally, it took the Photoshop skills of dedicated bloggers to find the "humanoid."

• Click here for the full NASA image. The figure is near the bottom left corner.

"NASA scientists have been puzzled by the peculiarly life-like image," declared the Times of London, despite the apparent fact that no one from NASA has had any comment.

The skeptical Web site BadAstronomy.com, however, scoffed, "Puhlllleeeeze. A man? It's a tiny rock only a few inches high. It's only a few feet from the rover!"

Other British papers saw the humor in the story, with the Sun theorizing that it was Detective Gene Hunt, the drunken, sexist policeman from the BBC time-traveling crime series "Life on Mars."

"It's Usama bin Laden!" declared one Times of London commenter. "All this time we thought he was in Pakistan."


Great. this is what news is today.
no war.
no election.
no politics.
no challenges.
fucking heath ledger and martians.

and let's be honest, the fox news pic looks pretty sketchy to begin with, but when you see the whole NASA image, its just.....beyond humorous.

Dear Comcast,

Yolanda is going down! It's on.

I WILL get my money yet.

Love,
Rachel

europe thoughts:

working for room and board/odd jobs for families:
workaway.info
http://helpx.net/
http://www.wwoof.org/


and for the sleazy yet very real sleeping options:
http://www.hospitalityclub.org/
and the venerable couchsurfing.com

Monday, January 21, 2008

vid of the day.

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Drug Testing Set For Student Athletes In Illinois

what has it come to? seriously? 18 year olds don't dope.
...or do they?

Illinois - This year's state finals will be the last games students play without being tested for steroids.

Next year, whether it's basketball, football, or any other sport, whether it's girls or boys, every athlete competing in sectionals, regionals or championship games will be subject to random testing of banned drugs.

Students from Chicago's Whitney Young High School said they support the plan.

"I think it's a good idea because some students do use steroids," football player Eric Tabb said. seriously? that is fucked. though I guess if they're already doing coke and banging sluts, performance enhancing drugs don't seem so out of the question. oh, youth...

"I think it's fair to do it post-season. Then it rewards those who have worked really hard and punish those who have used steroids to get where they were then they didn't deserve it," soccer player Lauren Jorgensen.

Seriously. I wish he didn't love fetuses so much.

...because this guy is the cat's meow. Except for the abortion thing. And the Evangelical crap. ...And the hatred of fags. And his *AWESOME* bass shredding.
So, I guess he mostly sucks, but man, his people skills and loathing of fat people is RIGHT ON.

WARREN, Mich.: Confronted by crying toddler on Tuesday, Republican presidential hopeful Mike Huckabee quipped the child must be for his rival Mitt Romney.

"He's not the happiest boy today," Huckabee said, smiling for a picture with the boy and his brother and sister. "I think he must be a Romney voter. Look at him. He's so sad."

Huckabee greeted their mother and other supporters outside a polling place Tuesday in Michigan, where he was hoping for a decent showing but where GOP rivals Mitt Romney and John McCain were vying for first place.

Huckabee's wife, Janet, pelted him with snowballs as he shook hands, taking advantage of her last chance to play in the snow before heading to South Carolina Tuesday afternoon. Her husband scooped up a couple of handfuls and returned fire as she darted toward the campaign bus. [thats it, show that woman who's boss.]

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

$30M EMPIRE JUMP SUIT

January 15, 2008 -- The dopey daredevil who tried to parachute off the Empire State Building is coming down on the landmark with a $30 million lawsuit.

In the suit, which is expected to be filed today in Manhattan Supreme Court, Jeb Corliss says the security guards who thwarted his 2006 attempt at jumping off the building endangered his life and caused him "severe emotional distress."

Corliss' lawyer, Mark Jay Heller, said the suit also charges that the building's brass defamed him by claiming his conduct was illegal, when they knew the criminal charge against him had been thrown out of court.

The incident happened April 27, 2006, when Corliss, a highly experienced BASE - building, antenna, span or earth - jumper, tried to leap off the observation deck.

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Hotel guests stole TV in Monticello, police say

MONTICELLO — Two Monticello men were arrested yesterday on charges they ripped off the motel they were staying at.
ok, thats fair. shit happens.
Police said Aaron E. Morris, 25, and Shawn E. Nichols, 40, broke into the storage room of the Heritage Inn on Broadway around 3:30 a.m. and stole a flat-screen television.
still fair, we did it at oakwoods. Maybe the people at the hotel should hide things more copiously. MAYBE they should try locking the storage closets. [We needed that vacuum more than they did, anyways]
Police say they were captured carrying it by the motel’s video surveillance camera, and Morris was nabbed in the bathroom of the room he was renting with the TV.
QUICK. HIDE IT IN THE TUB! What?
Both men were charged with burglary, a felony, and sent to Sullivan County Jail on $10,000 bail.
...strikingly high bail for your neighborhood trailer trash.

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What next?

The Mecca Of Albino Squirrels. The National Barbed Wire Museum. Gopher Town. Not one, but TWO Greatest Balls of Twine.
...The midwest is no stranger to crappy museums advertising Americans general stupidity. Thankfully, this one can go down in the books as a fake.

...A Brad Pitt Museum in Missouri?
Brad Pitt's actor pals Don Cheadle and George Clooney have been fooled into thinking a bogus story about a museum honoring the hunk is for real.

Both Ocean's Eleven stars have commented on a 'planned' Pitt museum in the star's native Springfield, Missouri, but locals insist the story is "a hoax."

Susan Wade, the public relations manager at the Springfield Convention and Visitors Bureau, tells Usmagazine.com, "It's a bogus story. I was quoted in November saying, `We joke that we need a Brad Pitt museum,' (and) changes were made to the quote."


Not that I would put it past the state.....it's enthralling delights barely warranted the one stop I made while there (an unfortunate necessity, the gas tank being on "E" and all)
But can you imagine? A bunch of fat, sloppy red neck women groping themselves amongst other women who also imagine their fat, sloppy redneck husbands to look just like the shmuck?
Man, it's almost to good to handle.

THIS IS SO SCARY....Drug-resistant staph found to be passed in gay sex

SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - A drug-resistant strain of potentially deadly bacteria has moved beyond the borders of U.S. hospitals and is being transmitted among gay men during sex, researchers said on Monday. They said methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus, or MRSA, is beginning to appear outside hospitals in San Francisco, Boston, New York and Los Angeles.

Sexually active gay men in San Francisco are 13 times more likely to be infected than their heterosexual neighbors, the researchers reported in the Annals of Internal Medicine.

"Once this reaches the general population, it will be truly unstoppable," said Binh Diep, a researcher at the University of California, San Francisco who led the study. "That's why we're trying to spread the message of prevention."

According to chemical analyses, bacteria are spreading among the gay communities of San Francisco and Boston, the researchers said.
"We think that it's spread through sexual activity," Diep said.

This superbug can cause life-threatening and disfiguring infections and can often only be treated with expensive, intravenous antibiotics.
It killed about 19,000 Americans in 2005, most of them in hospitals, according to a report published in October in the Journal of the American Medical Association.

Of those people who carry staph, most carry it in their noses but community-based MRSA also can live in and around the anus and is passed between sexual partners.

Quote of the Day

Congressman Ventura, on the new green cafeteria for the House.

“We have had a few people observe that [straw] phenomenon and we had to tell them, ‘Sip your coffee like a normal human being,’” Ventura said. “We’re trying to save the planet here.”

Monday, January 14, 2008

New Yorker Toon Zune of the day.

Sunday, January 13, 2008

A note from Madeleine K. Albright.

To begin, Mr. President or Madam President: You must honor our troops by always keeping their sacrifices in mind, limiting them to essential missions, equipping them to do their jobs, and bringing them home safely and as soon as circumstances permit.

Second, you must recognize that the American flag includes both red and blue and that bipartisanship is not a four letter word. Neither Democrats nor Republicans have a monopoly on wisdom.

Third, bear in mind that our country is exceptional because of its resources, traditions and ideals, not because we carve out exceptions for ourselves to the rules we insist that others obey; torture is not a weapon with which to fight terror; on the contrary, it has been a humiliation to us and a gift to Al Qaeda.

Fourth, understand that, to many overseas, America today is identified more with violence and arrogance than justice and liberty - more with Guantanamo than Omaha Beach. Your actions and words can change that, but you are not the only story-teller on the street (or Internet). This means that you will have to work hard to resurrect confidence in the American brand. Speak carefully; listen patiently; earn respect without assuming or demanding it; and do battle each day with the axis of evil: poverty, ignorance, and disease.

Fifth, attack Al Qaeda at its weakest point. These terrorists are not warriors but murderers who kill the unarmed, children, and Muslims. They offer no vision for the future except the sword. They should not be accused of Islamic terrorism for their crimes are profoundly un-Islamic. As president, you should make reference frequently and with favor to the Judeo-Christian-Islamic tradition.

Sixth, don't allow President Bush's mistakes to dissuade you from promoting democracy. Subtract the passion for liberty from America and we would not be America. Remember, though, that democracy must evolve; it cannot be imposed. It is forged through the blending of lofty ideals with street level experience, as people dare to entrust their rights to others while gaining confidence in the rule of law.

Seventh, believe in the American people. We're not cowed by danger and we are far more willing to sacrifice than most politicians suspect, provided we're treated like adults and told the truth.

Eighth, reward honesty, not flattery; the advisers you need most are those who will be unafraid to warn you when you are about to go astray.

Ninth, learn from the past, but don't rely on historical clichés to dictate future actions. The world never stops in the same place twice. Not every enemy is Hitler and intelligent acts of diplomacy should not be confused with appeasement.

Finally, forget Mt. Rushmore; if you are to leave the White House with your head held high, you must be ever mindful of your own capacity for error and that the voters, not God, made you president. Greatness doesn't come by pursuing greatness; it comes through the steady application of intelligence, guts and nerve to the pursuit of honorable ends.

Madeleine K. Albright, secretary of state from 1997 to 2001, is author of "Memo to the President Elect: How We Can Restore America's Reputation and Leadership."

Saturday, January 12, 2008

A word on COFFEE

from the greatest book I've read in a long time, Starbucked, by Taylor Clark.

Every day, Beethoven counted out exactly sixty beans for his ideal cup. Voltaire threw mugs of it back by the dozen, and the French novelist Honore de Balzac reputedly drank as many as sixty cups daily - a claim that sounds absurd until one reads his acid-trip account of coffee's effect on his mental faculties: "Ideas quick-march into motion like battalions of a grand army to its legendary fighting ground, and the battle rages...Forms and shapes and characters rear up; the paper is spread with ink - for the nightly labor begins and end with torrents of this black water.

New York Mom Allegedly Put Son, 7, in Oven as Punishment

AIRMONT, N.Y. — Police arrested a woman Friday after her 7-year-old son told authorities she burned him in an oven, and a day-care worker was arrested for not reporting the attack, authorities said.

The mother, 26-year-old Tiffany Fraser of Tallman, was charged with assault and endangering a child, authorities said.

Police began investigating after the boy was spotted alone at a shopping center and told officers he had run away because "his mother had put him in an oven and burned him as a punishment," according to police reports.

The day-care worker, 37-year-old Joelle Lherisson, was charged with failure to report child abuse. Both Fraser and Lherisson were arraigned in Airmont Village Court and released until their next court dates.
Lherisson told WCBS-TV that the boy showed no signs of abuse, and she had taken good care of him.

"There was nothing wrong with the child," she said.

Fraser's lawyer, Edward Cigna, declined to comment. There was no phone listing for Fraser.

Lt. Brad Weidel of the Town of Ramapo police force, which covers Airmont, said the boy's burns — on his nose, arm, hand and left leg — were noticed at a daycare center owned by Lherisson in July, but Lherisson did not report them.

When the boy reported the oven incident at the shopping center, he and a sibling were removed from their home by the Rockland County children's agency and police began an investigation that led to both arrests, Weidel said.

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

absolutely the cutest kid i have ever seen.

Parking fine for vintage tractor

The owner of a vintage tractor said he was stunned to get a parking ticket for his 1957 Ferguson machine which had not left its storage shed for years.
Derek Coldrick, 61, received the £60 penalty ticket from Herefordshire Council claiming his tractor was parked illegally in Broad Street, Hereford.

"It looks lovely and shiny but it doesn't have any brakes or lights and a top speed of 3mph," he said.

The council said it appeared his number plate details had been cloned.

It is an amazing vehicle but you could barely get it to the edge of town, let alone Hereford.

When Mr Coldrick, who lives in Cirencester, contested the ticket, Herefordshire Council accepted his explanation and cancelled the penalty charge

He said: "When I saw the letter it was a big shock, but after seeing the registration I realised it was not for my car but for the tractor in my shed.
"To my knowledge the tractor has never been out of it.

"I think I would have been pulled over very quickly if I had been spotted. It would have been even funnier if it had been a speeding ticket."

The council said it believed the registration plates were copied and warned him that he was likely to contacted again if the other vehicle was involved in similar incidents.

Teenager dies running from police

A teenager has died after being hit by a car as he ran away from police officers on the M1.
As the officers approached the youths, they ran off. One scaled a fence onto the M1 and was hit by a vehicle. The other two have not been traced.

An inquiry into the death on Tuesday evening has been launched and the independent police watchdog informed.

Two other people were injured in collisions behind the car which struck the dead youth.

One person suffered a head injury and the other was hurt in the chest.

The officers were investigating reports of youths pushing a suspected stolen moped in an underpass in Kingsbury, north-west London, when the pursuit began.

The Independent Police Complaints Commission (IPCC) has been informed of the death as a matter of course.

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Beige lovers adopt shunned pale penguin

A freak penguin being bullied because of its unusual light-brown colouring has won support from champions of all things beige.
The Beige Brigade spokesman Paul Ford said he was touched to read of the penguin with no mates in The Dominion Post.

The brigade – a group of Kiwi cricket fans with a love of the brown and beige national cricket uniform of the 1980s – now wanted to sponsor it.

"The poor little bugger," Mr Ford said.

"It was just the fact that it was being ostracised for wearing beige. We could empathise with that, it's a much maligned colour."
The penguin was spotted by a team of Australian researchers restoring the historic Mawson's Huts at Cape Denison in Antarctica.

Because of a lack of pigmentation it was missing its trademark black "dinner jacket", which was instead a dirty beige. Penguins like this are rare because they stand out and are usually attacked by predators.

Photographer Brett Jarrett described it getting picked on and harassed by other penguins.
Other Beige Brigade members e-mailed Mr Ford the story of the penguin's plight. "They said: 'Hey, we should do something here'."

Mr Ford said it was a serious offer, and the Beige Brigade might look at doing something to help Adelie penguins, which are threatened by climate change.

Tongue in cheek, he suggested maybe a simple can of spray paint could do the trick.
The Beige Brigade would contact the Mawson's Huts expedition to see how to help the little beige penguin.

Seniors unnerved by closeup view of their final stop

COEUR D’ALENE, Idaho - Oldsters in this town are protesting plans to open a funeral home across the street from their senior center, saying it would be a little too close for comfort.

About 100 people signed a petition calling on the City Council to deny James Asper and Mary Hansen, partners in Aspen Funeral Home LLC, a permit to open their funeral home across the street from the Lake City Senior Center, senior center manager Vickie Harrison said. They plan to present the petition at a Feb. 5 hearing, she said.

“I don’t like it at all. It kind of gives you an uncomfortable feeling,” said petitioner Marg Dunkle, 65.

“We find it a little disconcerting that they would think that location is intentional,” Hansen said.

But some seniors, like Doy Seng, 81, had a practical view of the proposed funeral home.

“We’re old here. We’re all ready to go,” she said. “I think it will be handy.”

holy crap.

Cops: Beauty does double duty as beast


Kumari Fulbright, 25, midway through her second year in law school, is charged with kidnapping, armed robbery, aggravated robbery and aggravated assault.

If in fact she’s guilty, Fulbright should know better. The former Miss Arizona contestant recently completed an internship clerking for a federal judge. She also posed wearing a shiny black bikini in a 2008 calendar that features women with guns.

Fulbright is accused of holding and torturing her 24-year-old ex-boyfriend in early December with the help of three other men, including another man she had previously dated. Cops think the dispute was over jewelry the ex-beau suspect had given Fulbright; the accused nogoodniks thought the other ex-boyfriend had stolen it.

Fulbright invited the man to her apartment, then excused herself to shower, cops said. Then two men showed up, bound him with zip ties and duct tape, accused him of taking the jewelry, and threatened to shoot him. When Fulbright finished her shower, cops say she bit him on his forearm, right hand and ear, held a butcher knife to his head, and said she was going to kill him. The victim managed to free a hand and grabbed a gun, which fired but hit no one.

Texas mother apologizes for fake essay in Hannah Montana contest

GARLAND, Texas - A woman apologized Friday for a "bad decision" in helping her 6-year-old daughter win tickets to a Hannah Montana concert with an essay that falsely claimed the girl’s father died in Iraq.

Priscilla Ceballos said she hadn’t intended to mislead the contest sponsor but got caught up in helping her daughter "realize her dream of seeing Hannah Montana."

"Instead I brought so much negative attention to my family," Ceballos said, reading a statement on NBC’s "Today" show. "Please accept my heartfelt apology and please do not punish my child for my mistake."

Ceballos apologized specifically to the military and military families for falsely claiming the girl’s father died in a roadside bombing in Iraq.

"I just wanted to help my daughter write a compelling story," she said. "There is no more compelling story than the struggle and sacrifices of our military and their families."

Officials with Chicago-based chain Club Libby Lu surprised the girl with the tickets and a makeover Dec. 28 at a store in a suburban Dallas mall. Club Libby Lu sells clothes, accessories and games for young girls.

The essay won her the grand prize: airfare for four to Albany, N.Y., and four tickets to the sold-out Hannah Montana concert Jan. 9. The opening line in the essay was: "My daddy died this year in Iraq."

Piggy bank thief held on $10G

SHEBOYGAN, Wis. - A man has been charged with sneaking into a toddler’s bedroom and stealing $20 from a piggy bank while the 2-year-old girl slept.

Authorities say DNA evidence linked Ryan A. Mueller, 30, of Sheboygan Falls to Aug. 10 crime in Wilson.

Authorities say the girl’s mother was in another room with another child when she saw a light turn on in her 2-year-old daughter’s room. She walked into the girl’s bedroom and saw a man shaking the piggy bank as the girl slept.

The man fled before police arrived, stealing the money but leaving the piggy bank. Authorities say blood was found on a window blind where the burglar had forced his way into the home.

Mueller was charged Thursday with felony burglary, which carries a penalty of up to 9 years in prison. His bond was set at $10,000, and a preliminary hearing was set for next Wednesday.

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Dude, the cops will never smell it

LAKEHURST, N.J. - Lakehurst police didn’t have to go far to make a marijuana arrest. An officer heading home early Saturday smelled pot burning in the police station parking lot.

Authorities said Sergeant Ronald Heinzman asked some other officers to take a whiff. Police said they heard a conversation centered on the irony of smoking pot next to the station from a home separated from the parking lot by a chain-link fence.

Police knocked on the door and arrested Benjamin Gordon, 18, of Farmville, Va.

NYC woman stunned to find she’s online ’hottie’ in sex ad

NEW YORK - A Brooklyn woman says she was subjected to dozens of distasteful phone calls after someone posted an online ad saying she was offering sex for money to pay off Christmas purchases.

Forty-year-old Anna O’Malley says the ad posted Wednesday on the online clearinghouse Craigslist used her name and telephone number. It described her as "a real hottie looking to earn extra cash to pay off Christmas debt."

The ad has been taken down, but the appalled O’Malley says she has had to change her phone number.

A statement from chief executive Jim Buckmaster says Craigslist will help law enforcement agencies try to track down the poster if O’Malley wants to pursue the case.

Last winter, a Manhattan woman was deluged with inquiries after a bogus Craigslist posting offered her apartment for rent, in an apparent scheme to collect fees from prospective tenants.

Walt Disney World bans children from fanciest park restaurant

Now this just isn't fair.
ORLANDO, Fla. - The home of Mickey Mouse, Tigger and Tinkerbell has banned kids from its fanciest restaurant.

Beginning this week, children under 10 are no longer welcome at Victoria & Albert’s in the Grand Floridian Resort & Spa. Victoria & Albert’s is Walt Disney World’s only restaurant with an AAA five-diamond rating.

"We want to be the restaurant that’s available for that adult experience," said general manager Israel Perez.
Only about three families a month ever brought young children to Victoria & Albert’s, said Rosemary Rose, Disney’s vice president for food, beverage and merchandise operations.

Men are required to wear jackets, and women must wear dresses or pantsuits. The hushed atmosphere features live harp music, and the menu, which changes daily, offers seven-course dinners that can last as long as three hours. Prices start at $125 a person.

Rose noted that there are plenty of dining options for families at Disney, which World has 97 other full-service restaurants.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

This is for you, Miss Casey

....seems he's gone from torturing innocent rusty's to torturing innocent dudes.

Man accused of assault at gas station
DERRY – A local man faces multiple felony charges after trying to cut a man's throat during a dispute at a gas station, police said.
Police arrested Ryan Halloran, 23, of 2 Fairway Drive, Apt. 122, late Friday night after he reportedly approached Robert Thomsen with a knife and started slashing at him at the Island Pond Mobil, according to court papers.
Halloran faces felony charges of attempted first-degree assault and criminal threatening with a weapon, as well as a misdemeanor charge of attempted simple assault. Police allege Halloran also attempted to punch the man in the face.

Police began investigating the incident shortly after 4 p.m. Friday after Thomsen reported that a man attempted to punch him in the face and slash his throat with a 10-inch kitchen knife, court papers say.
Thomsen later picked Halloran out of an 8-person photographic line-up. An independent witness also corroborated Thomsen's version of the incident, Officer Kevin Ruppel wrote in his report.

Derry Police Capt. Vernon Thomas said the incident took place in the gas station parking lot during a dispute over someone honking a car horn.

Halloran also faces two felony charges of driving with a revoked license. Police said he drove to the gas station parking lot and to Goodhue Road in Derry, even though he had been deemed a habitual offender by the director of motor vehicles on Dec. 1, 2006.

Halloran has also been charged in connection with a Dec. 9 incident during which he allegedly broke an exterior window at a Fairway Drive apartment and threatened to punch a woman in the face.
He faces misdemeanor charges of criminal threatening and criminal mischief for that incident.

Halloran has convictions for drug possession, simple assault, criminal mischief, disorderly conduct and resisting arrest on his record, court papers say.

...seems some people never change.

'Dumbest criminal' caught in SA

Police in South Africa's capital, Pretoria, claim to have to caught the "dumbest criminal" this year.
The man walked into a station to report that he had been held up at gunpoint by a gang who had stolen his mobile phone.

But when the detective phoned the number of the phone reportedly stolen, it rang in the complainant's pocket.

"The shock left him speechless for a few minutes," said police spokesman Eugene Opperman, adding that the man, 25, was then arrested for perjury.

The police issued a statement entitled "Dumbest criminal?" with details of the weekend incident, South Africa's Star newspaper reports.

"At the end of the interview, he rang the complainant's cell phone number, and it rang in the man's pocket," Mr Opperman said, according the Beeld paper.
"He told the detective that he'd given him the wrong number," he said.

"But couldn't explain why the phone in his pocket had the corresponding serial number, or why it was same make and fitted the description he had given of the 'stolen phone'."

South Africa's reputation has long been tarnished by the high levels of crime, often accompanied by extreme violence involving guns.

'Dumbest criminal' caught in SA

Police in South Africa's capital, Pretoria, claim to have to caught the "dumbest criminal" this year.
The man walked into a station to report that he had been held up at gunpoint by a gang who had stolen his mobile phone.

But when the detective phoned the number of the phone reportedly stolen, it rang in the complainant's pocket.

"The shock left him speechless for a few minutes," said police spokesman Eugene Opperman, adding that the man, 25, was then arrested for perjury.

The police issued a statement entitled "Dumbest criminal?" with details of the weekend incident, South Africa's Star newspaper reports.

"At the end of the interview, he rang the complainant's cell phone number, and it rang in the man's pocket," Mr Opperman said, according the Beeld paper.

"He told the detective that he'd given him the wrong number," he said.

"But couldn't explain why the phone in his pocket had the corresponding serial number, or why it was same make and fitted the description he had given of the 'stolen phone'."

South Africa's reputation has long been tarnished by the high levels of crime, often accompanied by extreme violence involving guns.

ay ay ay

So much voter guilt. Why is it so difficult to enact one's civic responsibility.
I don't think I could be content with either decision, but MAN I feel like I did something wrong!
eek!
how is one supposed to vote, really though......for the right now or for the long haul? and how do you ever know if you've made the right decision?

a side note: I went to a Clinton rally last night, and when waiting to get in the child behind me commented on the Santa that was there to promote "stop global warming."
"Mom, look! Santa's here! And he's voting for Hillary!!!!"
adorable.
until linda flung around, and in typical Paiste fashion claimed that "of course Santa would not be voting, because Santa was a resident of the North Pole and to be voting in the US elections you needed to be an American citizen."
might have well have beaten the kid and told him the Easter Bunny was a farce. He was NOT happy.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Bogota opens 'museum of laziness'

A museum dedicated to laziness has opened in Colombia's capital, Bogota.
The event features sofas placed in front of televisions, hammocks and beds - anything associated with the avoidance of work.

The idea is to get people during the holiday season to think about laziness and its opposite, extreme work, and perhaps reach some balanced conclusion.

Visitors will have to shed their laziness long enough to get to the museum soon - it closes in a week.


'Social issues'

The BBC's Jeremy McDermott in Colombia says Bogota's newest museum, sponsored by the city government, is much-visited and could be ideal for those overwhelmed by the traffic, the fumes, the fast pace of life or the pressures of work.

Marcela Arrieta, the museum curator, told Associated Press news agency: "We always think about laziness as an enemy of work.

"So we wanted to explore that and make people think about the social issues implied in taking a nap, in being jobless or in feeling that maybe we are wasting time - so we want to ask ourselves about that."

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Teen charged after trying to race unmarked cop car

An 18-year-old driving his parents’ new car on the highway near Windsor today tried to race an unmarked police car this morning, reaching 160 km/h before he was arrested.

Sgt. Cam Woolley of the OPP said the detachment commander with Chatham-Kent OPP was driving toward Windsor in an unmarked Chevrolet Impala with tinted windows when a young man pulled up alongside him in a Chrysler 300. The driver tried repeatedly to get the uniformed officer to race, not allowing him to pass and travelling at higher and higher speeds.

When the Chrysler’s speed reached 160 km/h, the officer stopped the young motorist out of concern for safety.

“The officer didn’t want to go higher,” Woolley said. “He felt the young man would have kept increasing in speed.”

The young man is a beginner driver at the second stage of the graduated licensing program, with a G2 class license.

Woolley said, “He was playing tough guy until he got stopped. Then he cried until his parents got there.”

The young man’s licence has been suspended and the car impounded for a week. The minimum penalty for street racing is a $2,000 fine.

The officer’s unmarked Chevrolet Impala does not look like a police car and is used to hunt for aggressive drivers.

The incident occurred just days after an 85-year-old Thornhill man was charged under street racing legislation which came into effect on Sept. 30. Police say the elderly motorist was driving at 161 km/h. He is the oldest person charged under the new legislation.

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Teen charged after trying to race unmarked cop car

An 18-year-old driving his parents’ new car on the highway near Windsor today tried to race an unmarked police car this morning, reaching 160 km/h before he was arrested.

Sgt. Cam Woolley of the OPP said the detachment commander with Chatham-Kent OPP was driving toward Windsor in an unmarked Chevrolet Impala with tinted windows when a young man pulled up alongside him in a Chrysler 300. The driver tried repeatedly to get the uniformed officer to race, not allowing him to pass and travelling at higher and higher speeds.

When the Chrysler’s speed reached 160 km/h, the officer stopped the young motorist out of concern for safety.

“The officer didn’t want to go higher,” Woolley said. “He felt the young man would have kept increasing in speed.”

The young man is a beginner driver at the second stage of the graduated licensing program, with a G2 class license.

Woolley said, “He was playing tough guy until he got stopped. Then he cried until his parents got there.”

The young man’s licence has been suspended and the car impounded for a week. The minimum penalty for street racing is a $2,000 fine.

The officer’s unmarked Chevrolet Impala does not look like a police car and is used to hunt for aggressive drivers.

The incident occurred just days after an 85-year-old Thornhill man was charged under street racing legislation which came into effect on Sept. 30. Police say the elderly motorist was driving at 161 km/h. He is the oldest person charged under the new legislation.

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A cereal offender caught

A DOZY burglar was caught after she left a trail of CORNFLAKES from the scene of crime.
Amber McCarthy, 31, accidentally scattered the cereal after stealing cash from a florist’s till.

Cops followed the 300-yard trail to her hotel in Bexhill, East Sussex.

They found cash and flowers in her room, Hove Crown Court heard.

McCarthy, of Eastbourne, had grabbed the cereal from the hotel’s bar. She admitted the burglary and three others and got a three-year supervision order.

A police source said: “Everyone’s having a bit of a chuckle over it.”

Dad stole TVs to pay for girl's prom

PONTIAC, Ill., Jan. 4 (UPI) -- A man caught breaking into a Rent-A-Center store in Pontiac, Ill., to steal big screen TVs said he turned to crime to pay for his daughter's prom.

Manual Gaines was spotted after police officers on patrol heard breaking glass outside the business, The Bloomington (Ill.) Pantagraph reported Friday. Officers chased a stolen van onto Interstate 55 and found more than $10,000 worth of plasma screen televisions inside the abandoned vehicle.

Gaines, 36, was arrested in a field nearby where he was trying to hide.

He pleaded guilty to burglary, reckless driving and drug possession charges, but told the judge in a handwritten letter he perpetrated the heist was so his 17-year-old daughter could have nice high school graduation pictures and attend her senior prom.

Sentencing was set for Feb. 11.
daaaadddd, thats soooo embarasssing!

Houston Woman Finds Christ-Like Image in Potato


A FOX viewer said she discovered the image of Jesus inside a potato. See the images and judge for yourself

Man Building Cadillac Ranch out of RV’s

Frank Bates is an old-school salesman, a little extravagant, a little unorthodox. He's dedicated his life to his RVs. "It's a great thing!" Frank said, "We're selling something that's fun."

So it didn't surprise people much when he pursued his latest outlandish venture. That was, until it started going up. At the property adjacent to his lot off I-4, he proudly exclaims, "This is going to be the Airstream Ranch."

If the odd sight of eight Airstream RVs sticking straight up out of the ground is a little jarring, but recognizable, it should. It's fashioned after Cadillac Ranch off Route 66 in Texas.

"It was a piece of art that's always been recognized and is world famous," he said. He wants to create the same effect right off the I-4 corridor. Frank says Airstreams are the Cadillac's of RVs, so it was only fitting. An exhibit—art—he says—forever emblazoning a part of Americana.

"I think it's spectacular," said Bill Bowman. He's stopped by with his wife Sylvia to look at the strange sight. They drove all the way from St. Pete Beach to see it. They travel the country seeing America's oddities.
Neighbor Michelle O'Connor says, "We're not a tourist attraction like Cadillac Ranch. We don't want to be a tourist attraction. "We want to be a country road where we live peacefully," she said.

She told FOX 13 someone from the county should have had a say. "This is art. We don't need permits for art," Bates said, "And it's our property."

He has offered to put up a fence so they won't have to look at it. They're still milling that over. They county is expected to get back to the neighbors on their complaint in the next few weeks. In the meantime, Airstream Ranch will stand tall and proud.

Lucky for Frank, art, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.

Boob job end to army job

A WOMAN has been kicked out of army training because she has silicone breast implants.
Alessija Dorfmann, 23, said: “I am devastated. It has always been my dream to be a soldier and have a great figure.

“Now my fake boobs have cost me my job.”

She has appealed against the ruling by top brass in Hamburg, Germany, who said implants increased risk of injury.

Truckload of rodeo bulls stolen in downtown Nashville

A truck loaded with prize rodeo bulls was hijacked in downtown Nashville late Friday night.
Between 12 and 25 bulls were on the truck, ready to be delivered to Nashville Municipal Auditorium for Saturday night's Professional Champion Bullriding show, when a thief jumped into the cab around 10:30 p.m.

According to eyewitnesses, the woman who was driving the truck at the time was able to jump to safety, despite the carjacker's attempt to keep her inside.

“They had just loaded the bulls into a trailer, and the truck was running, and a subject jumped into the driver’s seat of the truck and fled the scene,” said Metro Police Sgt. Robert Durbin of the central precinct.

Bill Sauber, whose family is organizing the rodeo show, witnessed the crime. The truck was one of several delivering animals to the show overnight, and Sauber said the rodeo should continue as scheduled Saturday, whether the bulls are recovered or not.

"I can't imagine why anyone would want to steal a truck full of bulls," he said. "It could be even worse if they decide to release them in the city somewhere, I suppose."

Can Spiderman help UN beat evil?

When critics attack the United Nations, they often accuse the world body of being a web of bureaucracy.
Now officials there are hoping to turn that image around by using the web of Spiderman. The UN recently announced a union with the comic book company, Marvel. Together, they aim to print a special comic that will see the superhero fight alongside UN aid workers and peacekeepers.
The UN is now seeking private backing so it can distribute 1m free copies to American schoolchildren. The project's creator, the French producer Romuald Sciora, says he hopes it will then be translated into European languages.

'Desperate measure'
Already critics warn their spider-sense is tingling.
John Bolton, the outspoken former US envoy to the UN, called it an "act of desperation". He said the world body should concentrate on improving its overall performance. "You can have Spiderman in a comic book all you want, but it's not going to change public perception," he told the BBC.

Jerry Gladstone, co-owner of New York's Midtown Comics store, told the BBC Spiderman's face was better known than such Marvel companions as the X-Men and Fantastic Four. His colleague, Brian Quinn, noted that Spiderman's story makes him "one of the most relatable characters in all of comic books".

"Spidey", he said, is "just an average guy" who struggles to use his incredible powers responsibly. That, he suggested, is not so far from the position of the UN. Ultimately, though, the project's success or failure does not depend on the Green Goblin or Dr Doom, but on the reaction of its target audience.

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Tuesday, January 1, 2008

a great word i just learned

filk

acronym for A Faggot I'd Like to Kill. a person who is being really faggy, so faggy in fact that one wants to kill this person.

Anthony: "dude i like to suck on balls"

Jamal: "Shut up anthony and quit being such a filk"


Can also be used as a verb; to filk, filked.

1. "I fuckin hate Jon, he's such a FILK!"
2. "You queers are filking it up in here."


example:

vid of the day

Iron mask wager 'was a fib'

Even the great fictional traveller Phileas Fogg would have baulked at such a wager: walk around the world while pushing a pram and wearing an iron mask, and pick up a wife along the way without ever letting her see your face or know your name.

Just to make it a little more interesting, you can set off with only one change of underwear and £1 in your pocket and your sole source of income must be the sale of postcards.

Harry Bensley accepted the wager with John Pierrepoint Morgan, the founder of JP Morgan Bank, and Lord Lonsdale, in 1908, for £21,000 - equivalent to £1.5 million today.

He became an Edwardian celebrity after trekking 30,000 miles across 19 countries over six years. As compensation, he was given £4,000.

However, on the 100th anniversary of his departure from Trafalgar Square his great-grandson fears that his ancestor may have told a fib or two.

Despite more than 20 years of research he has not found a shred of evidence his ancestor ever left Britain.

"It seems very odd that he leaves in a blaze of publicity and then there is nothing about him until he re-emerges six years later claiming to have travelled around the world," said Ken McNaught, 49, of Wakefield, Yorks.

"I suspect that he disappeared for five years, probably to France, and came back at the outbreak of the First World War."

His ancestors now believe the journey was more likely a forfeit after Bensley, a well known chancer and playboy, lost his fortune in a game of cards with the two men.

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Victim of false rape claim must pay £12,500 for bed and board in jail

A man wrongly jailed when a woman cried rape has failed to prevent being charged £12,500 for his "board and lodging" while in prison.
Warren Blackwell, 38, spent three years in jail as a convicted sex attacker until his 'victim' was unmasked as a fantasist.

It was revealed he has been awarded £252,500 compensation for his lost years - but minus the estimated cost of his food and accommodation while behind bars.
Mr Blackwell said he had failed to stop the money being siphoned off after his lawyer told him there was little to be done about it.

The father-of-two, said: "It's the principle of the thing. They slam you in jail for three years and four months, brand you a sex attacker, leave your family to cope without you, then turn around and say sorry but demand £12,500 for living expenses incurred during your time inside.

"I tried to fight against it but my solicitor says the only hope of overturning the decision would be to go all the way to the European Court of Human Rights. I would probably use up all the compensation money on legal fees if I did that."

Not only did Mr Blackwell not commit the crime, but the crime had never taken place.
...just nuts...

Production of XXX movies banned in China

BEIJING, Jan. 1 (UPI) -- Chinese movie studios risk losing permission to shoot films if they produce hardcore sex movies.

China's censors, the State Administration of Radio, Film and Television, also banned erotic movie producers, directors or actors from competing for any film awards or taking part in any such awards, Xinhua reported.

Along with banning depictions of hardcore sexual activity and rape, the censors are restricting vulgar language and song lyrics, as well as sound effects with sexual connotations, Xinhua said.

The Beijing News quoted the ordinance as saying "The heaviest punishment for such violation would lead to a five-year ban of perpetrators from the movie industry," the state-run news agency reported.

The censors warned all major studios and local regulators to "bear their own responsibility in correcting the wrong deeds of producing erotic movies. Violating studios might face the harshest punishment of revoking permits for shooting films."